How to make peace with your sleep struggles in four simple steps
When was the last time you woke up feeling like you slept so well that you stretched in bed, smiled, and said, “Wow! I feel so good,”?
If you’re like most women, this was years ago, before you had kids, before your big work promotion, or this might only happen when you’re on vacation, without your daily stress or worries.
I wish every woman slept so well that they feel like they’re on vacation every day. Unfortunately, that’s not the case for many women. For years, I struggled with insomnia, anxiety and depression. I lay wide awake, tossing and turning at three am, frustrated, resolving my friend’s problems and avoiding my own.
This pattern I developed for negative thoughts would spiral into the worst catastrophe. But not everything was negative. I also caught myself being creative after eight p.m. and unable to stop my “Walt Disney brain”. Either way, being awake at three am was frustrating, while my then-partner happily snored beside me.
If you can relate to this, you might wonder how I can make peace with my sleep struggles and enjoy my life in the process.
After seven years on this Sleep Simplified journey, I have learned that fighting yourself and being angry at the world won’t support your beauty sleep. Quite the opposite, it is essential to surrender, stop trying to control others’ lives, make peace with your past choices and sleep struggles.
Here are four simple steps that can help you make peace with your sleep struggles and start your sleep-simplified journey now:
Step 1: Set your destination
Think about planning a vacation. Set a realistic goal. If you only have $100 in your pocket and want to go to Mexico for the summer, it might not be realistic without getting into debt.
The same goes for your sleep. If you’re only sleeping three to four hours a night and your goal is to get eight hours, trying to achieve this goal in a week won't be very realistic, especially if you’re not getting professional support or have been struggling with insomnia for a long time.
Getting an extra 15 minutes of sleep might be more realistic and accessible without adding a ton of pressure. It might not feel like a shiny goal, but trust me, 15 minutes adds up quickly over time.
I have clients who only sleep three to four hours a night and got eight hours of beauty sleep after our initial session, but that wasn’t our initial goal; it was to get five hours of sleep, five days a week, in 90 days.
Step 2: Book your vacation
Now is the time to book your flight tickets, choose your ideal hotel, and reward yourself. Right after setting a goal, I ask my clients to pick an activity or gift they will give themselves.
Celebrating small and big wins helps keep you going when things get tough and helps you focus on your goal. Buying a book, flowers, or getting a massage can be great ways to reward yourself.
I’m currently writing this article while listening to the ocean waves in Los Cabos, Mexico while waiting for my friends to arrive. I booked this trip as a gift to myself after publishing the Spanish version of my book, Sleep Simplified.
If planning a vacation to a Mexican beach or your favorite spot in the world sounds ideal, but you don’t have a budget or time, you can celebrate by going to a Mexican restaurant and eating some fish tacos and setting a long-term goal to help you save for your trip.
Step 3: Pack your bags
Pack your bags as lightly as possible, both in theory and real life. It's time to release your extra baggage, which is not doing you any good.
What tasks, stories, or problems are you carrying that don’t belong to you? Either someone passed them to you, or you kindly volunteered. From personal experience, I can tell you that you will feel much lighter and happier when you release what’s not yours and focus that extra time, money, and energy on the things that bring you joy.
Just like packing to travel for your dream destination, you can also prepare for delays and extra expenses. When you decide to set boundaries at work with family and friends, people might not like it, and you might feel guilty, but please know that is part of the learning journey. Be kind to yourself and trust the process.
Step 4: Upgrade to first class
Good quality sleep is the best investment you can make in yourself. You deserve good sleep and to travel first-class. To achieve this, it is important to make some upgrades in your current situation.
Life upgrades are required, such as adding more money to your savings or getting an extra client to book your dream vacation. Making peace with your past choices and sleep struggles might require more time, money, and energy than you are willing to invest at this time, but starting small and starting tonight is key to getting outstanding results in the near future.
What upgrades can you make to your evening routine, relationships, relationships with yourself, and your beauty sleep? Here are some examples of life upgrades:
Going for a short morning walk to get your melatonin dose at night
Not watching TV or using electronics an hour before bed. Instead, play a yoga nidra meditation before bed to sleep deeper
Learning how to meditate to calm the mind to sleep peacefully
Buy and read a book to help you create a perfect evening routine that fits your lifestyle
Hire a sleep expert to support you in the process of better rest
Sleeping well doesn’t have to be a dream anymore; it can be your reality. You deserve it. Start by taking these steps to sleep to make peace with your sleep struggles. Slowly, work yourself up to upgrading your sleep so that you feel like you're on vacation every single night.
Cheers to beauty sleep.
Avocado hugs,
Monica
Monica Le Baron, MBA, is the award-winning author of Sleep Simplified and a sleep coach who helps high-achieving women go from chronic insomnia to sleeping like queens in 30 days or less. Download her 10-minute yoga Nidra audio to get one hour of rest in just 10 minutes. monicalebaron.com/freeyoganidra
