How I Stopped Chasing Work-Life Balance and Found a Better Way to Live

Rethinking Work-Life Balance

Work-life balance. How many times have you heard that phrase, and what feelings does it evoke in you? The idea of balance is often depicted as a scale—two weights on either side, needing to be perfectly equal to maintain equilibrium. Or perhaps a seesaw, where two people of the same weight must keep each other level.  

But how realistic is it to achieve “true” work-life balance based on this metaphor? Not just for a fleeting moment—but to actually maintain it?  

I stopped chasing this kind of balance when I had my second child ten years ago. Up until then, I had worked hard to keep everything in check—my career, my personal life, and my time with my firstborn. But when my second child arrived, the delicate balance I had so carefully built completely unraveled. Suddenly, it wasn’t just about managing work and home life, but also ensuring both children received equal attention. I even found myself keeping mental score—playing extra games with Play-Doh to “make up” for a day when the baby had been unsettled. Thinking back on it now, I can’t help but laugh.  

Add in a long work to-do list, and my idea of work-life balance flew straight out the window.  

A Different Approach to Balance

So how do we manage it all? How do you run a business or hold a job, stay present with family and friends, and still make time for your health and wellbeing?  

Let me share the simple shift that has become my lifeline.  

I stopped dividing my life into separate categories. Instead of splitting my time into “work,” “family,” and “health,” I now see my life as one whole. I no longer separate work tasks in my calendar or make distinct work to-do lists—I create life to-do lists and prioritise from there.  

A typical Tuesday in February might look like this:  

• Workout  

• Meeting with a supplier  

• Doctor’s appointment with my eldest daughter  

• Budget meeting  

• Write newsletter  

• Daily walk during my youngest’s dance lesson  

• Pay bills  

This approach has created so much more space in my life. It has made planning and prioritising easier, and most importantly, it has helped me recognise that my “mum duties” and “health goals” are just as important as my “work tasks.” If I have a doctor’s appointment or a school meeting, I don’t overload my list with too many other commitments.  

I’ve also learned to make better use of transitional moments. When I’m waiting at dance class, I bring my walking gear and go for an hour-long walk—regardless of the weather. Sometimes, I use this time to reflect on a blog post I’m writing, to think through a problem, or simply to allow my mind some well-deserved white space.  

Your Life as a Whole

As women, as mothers, as people, it’s easy to compartmentalise our lives—to separate our roles and have them compete against each other, leaving us feeling as though we’re never doing enough in any area.  

But what if we saw life as a whole? What if we treated our time as sacred? Work can happen on a park bench while the baby sleeps. Family time can take place during an event you genuinely want to attend. Movement can happen in the parking lot behind the football field.  

Perhaps it’s time we stop trying to balance it all—and instead, redefine work and focus on our whole life.  

Alexandra Nash is a dynamic leader, entrepreneur, and mother with a remarkable journey. She has founded and sold multiple businesses, worked with hundreds of entrepreneurs worldwide, and previously served as a tech CEO and business owner. Currently, she is the Head of Sustainability and holds multiple board positions.

Passionate about creating impact, Alexandra founded the social enterprise Yuhme and contributes to Ndara ti Beafrika. She also volunteers as a mentor at NyföretagarCentrum, supporting new entrepreneurs in their journeys. As the writer of the Substack publication The Diary of a Sustainability Advocate, she brings important conversations to the forefront.

Beyond her professional achievements, Alexandra is a former Swedish World Cup swimmer—demonstrating her drive, resilience, and dedication in all areas of life.  

All About Me: an inspiring, heartfelt and honest conversation with designer and brand founder Carla Bentele

Creativity runs deep in Carla Bentele’s world.“I’ve loved art since I was little. I even found in my ‘All About Me’ school book that when I was seven, I dreamt of becoming a fashion designer”, she recalls. As a designer, illustrator, and all-around creative, she has built a life that blends artistry with intention. Together with her partner Woody—her university love and a fellow creative—and their two children, Carla lives in a whitewashed 1600s barn, nestled beneath a canopy of trees overlooking the green hills of Todmorden, West Yorkshire.

After earning a degree in Fashion and Textiles, Carla spent over a decade designing childrenswear for high-street retailers, honing her expertise in color, fabric, and trends while working in Liverpool, Manchester, and London. But when the pandemic cost her a fashion job in London, she and Woody embraced a new chapter—returning north in search of space, adventure, and a deeper connection to nature.

Their dream was a home studio, and their centuries-old barn had just the spot. What was once a piggery is now a vibrant creative hub, complete with screen printing, Giclée printing, and Risograph—all set against breathtaking views. It was here that All About Me was born—a brand infused with Carla’s love of artistry, storytelling, and thoughtful design. Carla’s partner also runs his business, Studio Method, separately from this space.

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When was All About Me founded, and how did you come up with the idea?

All About Me was founded in 2021 under a different name and concept, but it evolved over time and officially launched as what it is today in 2024. The idea had been growing since my first maternity leave in 2018, when the thought of returning to three-hour commutes, work travel, and time away from my baby made me rethink my career path.

I started scribbling down business ideas, around a lifestyle brand combining parent & baby classes, creativity and product, talking to anyone who would listen and made vision boards of my new flexible future, but it felt scary and I loved my job so I went back to what I knew after maternity.

Six months later covid hit, and I was made redundant. This gave me the opportunity to make my vision board come to life. I initially retrained in baby massage and yoga, wanting to create a fun, colourful community for parents that focused on their well-being, not just the babys. I wanted to bring something fresh, and full of personality to the baby class scene.

Alongside that, I dreamed of clothing that gave off the same energy, and embodied positive, meaningful messaging like Grow with the Flow and No One Is You.

The brand was built on the messaging of a Positive, Mindful Attitude, a mantra that started as a bit of a joke when I was mopesing about gutted by the reality of losing my dream job and having to what felt like starting all over again, but this time with kids in tow. It became my way of reminding myself that I had got to a dream before and I could do it again!

After taking time out and slowing down, my mission became clear, to sprinkle fun and positivity into the chaos of everyday life. At the heart of it all, it’s about embracing self-expression, enjoying the little things, and not taking life too seriously.

After having my second baby in 2021, I decided to stop teaching my classes and focus fully on fashion and illustration, things that had always been part of me. And here we are!

What are your hero products and why?

The Positive Behavior Sweatshirt is my best-selling garment. I reckon that's because it’s fun with a relatable message, a bit of a tongue-in-cheek and who doesn't want to try and be positive.

I offer it in both adult and kids sizes, giving customers the opportunity to match with their minis. It always starts conversations whenever I wear it or when one of my kids has it on, and seems to make people laugh. 

The sustainably sourced cotton sweatshirt comes in hand dyed lilac tie dye or black and white, and everything is hand screen-printed by me using eco-friendly water-based ink from my studio.

My best-selling prints are the vibrant, colourful fine art Giclée birth flowers in vases. They’re fun and bright, but also have intentional meaning behind them. They've become a favourite because they not only add a pop of colour, but some customers buy them to represent their family members' birthdays, which honestly makes me tear up.

Each print comes with a QR code in the corner. When you scan it, the flower from the print blooms in augmented reality right in your space, and you can listen to me read the poem I’ve written about its unique qualities, set to the sound of birdsong, a little mindful moment right in your home. I guess this is kind of my USP, Augmented Reality (AR) art, bringing the print to life in a whole new way and something I want to do a lot more of.

What inspires you, and what goes into designing a new print and/or fashion piece?

I’m inspired by the little everyday moments and my own feelings. My Sunshine in Sicily Wall art collection was based on a rare child-free holiday, just me and my partner celebrating our big joint birthdays last year.

I documented it through paintings of small, special moments, like the zingy taste of a Sicilian lemon or the Buongiorno Caffè print. Think warm, rustic Italian colours and the smell of fresh coffee as you enjoy a pistachio filled croissant in a romantic piazza, surrounded by medieval palazzi.

I’m currently working on a collection of affirmation style prints, partly because I need words of affirmation myself, and I imagined a gallery wall filled with self-talk inspiration.

I’m terrible at journaling, but I can really articulate my thoughts through poetry, so my next collection features illustrations and hand-drawn slogans paired with poetry to motivate and inspire.

I visualise someone or me starting their day by scanning the little barcode on the artworks, for example one has an illustration of the sun, which  pops up in their space, and they hear me reading the poem I have written, all about how today is going to be ace. A little morning ritual to set the tone for the day.

My fashion pieces also carry strong, meaningful messages designed to celebrate individuality, like Own Your Weird or Work in Progress t-shirts. It’s fun, bold messaging that reflects the way I want to raise my kids and the community I want to empower. 

Part of your mission is to celebrate individuality and to add positivity into the chaos of everyday life —and this is definitely something we focus on here at heiter, too. Why do you think it is so important to be authentic and to maintain a positive outlook, especially in the times we are in?

Life is messy, extremely unpredictable, and full of highs and lows. I think I’ve learned that embracing who you are and trying to have a laugh along the way makes all the difference. 

I’ve personally struggled with self-doubt and the pressure to have everything figured out, especially after big life changes like relocating, starting my own business, and juggling motherhood. Adding in my dyslexic brain, which can slow me down, often makes life feel wild! 

It's important to me to share my journey authentically, especially in a world where social media often portrays life as always peachy, when in reality, it's not.

I want people to know that a positive outlook definitely isn’t about pretending everything is perfect, but it’s about finding those little moments of happiness, humour, and creativity even in the chaos. 

This year it is all about "Homecoming" here at heiter. What would you recommend to the heiter readers and community so that they can feel more at home, no matter where they are?

Ooh, well, I don’t have a specific place that feels like home, but wherever I’ve lived, I’ve always made it my own by filling it with all the treasures I’ve collected over the years, each with meaning and a story to tell, especially posters, art, plants and upcycled bits and bobs. I call it my magpie mentality :).

I also burn incense or aromatherapy oils, and friends always comment that my house has a distinct scent, it’s like a signature smell. It’s such a simple way to create a sense of home, no matter where you are.

I’m inspired by colour, texture, words, and typography to motivate, so I’d recommend starting to collect things that have a story from your journey. Fill your home with feel good art and colours that truly resonate with you. It’s actually been proven that colour can have a real impact on our mood. 

The theory suggests that surrounding yourself with uplifting colours, and even wearing them, can give you a boost of dopamine, the hormone that makes us feel good and helps us carry ourselves with confidence. 

So this is your sign to fill your walls and wardrobes with All About Me creations to make your home a better place :). Enter the code HEITER15 at checkout on my website for 15% off, just for your readers. Enjoy! www.all-about-me.co

You once mentioned that All About Me blends self-expression, creativity, and mindfulness while navigating the highs and lows of indie business. Tell us a bit more about what that looks like.

All About Me is about embracing all the silly little things life throws at us and finding growth or a lesson learnt whether it's good or bad. 

It’s about creating something that reflects who I am and what matters most to me, even when things aren't always clear as I'm a massive overthinker! I had an astrology birth reading recently that blew my mind as it was so accurate. It is literally a manual for me, reaffirming why I think the way I do, what I value, and the journey I'm on. It was a powerful reminder to trust my instincts and that actually everything is already written in the stars, like magic!

Through my designs, I blend self-expression, creativity, and mindfulness. Whether it’s an affirmation print or a meaningful statement on a piece of clothing, or a poem everything I create is intentional and hopefully relatable. My goal is to inspire positivity, help people feel good about themselves, and celebrate their individuality. 

Since moving out of London our life feels more wholesome. Still rather stressful with the whole economical climate of cost of living but that's another story! The mindfulness for me is in the simple, everyday moments like walking the kids to school through a sheep field, past waterfalls, and being woken by the owl. It's growing veggies, living on a hill with beautiful green views, and working surrounded by nature and fresh air. These moments ground me and inspire my creative work.

Running an indie business is a mix of creativity and the not-so-glamorous side of small business, which can be overwhelming at times. But even with the challenges, I try to focus on what matters and my reason for creating this journey and how bloody lucky I am that I get to follow my passion. 

Ultimately, I want to show my children that they can build a life around what they love. If I were to look back now, I wouldn’t have any regrets other than worrying too much. My career journey hasn’t gone quite as expected, but the love and time I share with my family are what truly matter.

Carla - outside her studio

What are things that make you feel heiter (which is German for cheerful/joyful)?

Really living in the seasons which feels so much more noticeable now that we’re in the country. In the summer, we love blackberries picking down our lane, and in the autumn collecting apples and making crumbles.

In Winter there are so many nice walks and sometimes sledging, and then in spring, we have a few ducks that come back every year that nest in a bush right outside our door. When the ducklings hatch they become part of our family and hang out with us in the garden. They peck on the cat flap as they know the kids will give them seeds or fat balls. It is so funny. Oh and the baby lambs are next level cute! I always get a bit of a buzz that we can create these fun, lovely memories that cost absolutely nothing.

On a Saturday we love to get our sour dough from Tod Market, make a picnic then go on a family walk. I say that laughing because we still have a double buggy! My kids are 6 and 3 but if we do the Todmorden to Hebden walk down the canal, they will have a nap, which means we get a sacred 40 mins peace to chat. They always wake up by the pub stop, then it's a picnic, park and sometimes ice cream, which means we all get our own happy fix!

I really appreciate being only 20 mins on the train to the city, where we can get a culture fix. The Factory Avivia Studios in Manchester is one of my favourite places to visit. The architecture is stunning, and the entire interior fills my heart with joy, and we have been to loads of interesting exhibitions and events there. I feel super lucky to have a balance of peaceful country life, with the buzz of the city not too far away.

Interview by Katharina Geissler-Evans, heiter

Images provided by All About Me